Monday, June 02, 2008
Finally weekend again,lolx..ytd was a VERY SLACK day at sch..reach sch at 8.30am and acc ling till 9am then went to class,thought will be having test bt thr r no test uh,so dismiss at 10.30am,if gt test then can earlier as finish can go lerHx,lol..then promised mum to acc her and the baby she take care of and the baby mum to a sinseh at dunno is tiong bahru,outram or..?Hahas..then went home straight after dismissed,was tinking of shld i walk home or take bus lata on,alittle bored uh..then decide to walk home then can view jwss awhile,really missed everything thr,was tinking of him too,and little did i expect i get to saw him,my gosh..wat a luck,i was so..LOL,so happy i guess the feeling,hahas..then he saw me too,lolx..xD. Reach home is 12.30pm,wait for the auntie to call and it was 1pm,went thr by cab..haven had my lunch,wait and wait after everything is finally done then hav lunch at 3pm-.-,then go home by cab too as bad weather,reach home..slp and waked then hav dinner,dad bought nasi lemak as mum told,after dinner watch tv and soso...sat,planned to went sentosa wif kcje,time was delayed frm 12pm to 1.30pm to 2.20pm,due to bad weather,then nv went sentosa,went vivo city...dunno whr to go-.-,sit at food republic and we chat thr,they ask me and say why i hang ling phone tat time,and i was ouh?When isit?Then ling say tat time when she call me then she wan tell me she at coop shop wif her ite friend then i hang her phone and nv listen,then ting and esther say i shldn't lik tat,cannot rely on them,ling hav her freedom wif her ite friend,i shld go and hav some friend too,actually i didn't do it on purpose,i was guilty too,i very sad tat time,then wat shld i do?Go find her tell her "ling,i very sad,u dun care ur ite friend,come pei me?"Becos i dun wan her trouble lik dunno shld acc me or her ite friend,so i choose to be alone,i wasn't feeling gd as well,i rememebr i didn't had my lunch tat day,i sit at the stadium for the whole break time,sobbing thr,listen to the song "peng you",tinking of many things and drawing of sumthing in my notebk.I even went late for class and when i reach class,i cry again,even some classmate oso noe abt tat..hw i wish,wish kcje was thr,wish to recieve their care and concern,wish was lik sec sch whenever i sad,they r thr for me.And then ting say,tat time she go out wif her ite friend,esther went along oso can be wif her ite friend very well,oso lik tat..why can't i?Well..i really wanna ans all their ques,let them noe wat i was tinking,bt..i cried,idiotic rite?I can't speak out wat i wanna say,i am afraid i can't control,their word really hurt,nt wat i wanna see,bt..changed,everything's different,they asked me tis ques "Do u hav anything wanna say?Any trouble?Tell us larHx",i wanna say..bt i can't,i noe i will burst out of tears again when i speak,i am trying to talk,really...bt,i shake my head and say none in the end,ting say "Why u lik tat?Last time u will say out everything,we four share everything out,nw u keep everything in ur heart",when i heard tis i really very sad,yea..we used to be,bt nw..nt i wanna change,bt everything's different,aren't lik last time can say out everything so simply lik juz talking to a very very kin person,ting and esther r lik sisters so much,they r very very gd sisters,me and ling aren't lik them so gd,always out tgt,say out everything,we nv..cos ling wun do tat,last time i will tell her troubles when esther and ting isn't same sch wif us lerHx,bt ling always nv care nv care derHx so i really found no one to talk to,when nw they notice me,realise me thr lerHx,i am no longer the person who speak out trouble easily lerHx,i dun wan lik tat too,i dunno hw to say it out,i noe..by mouth..bt hw to?I wanna ask them tis ques.."Do u all still care abt kcje?If let u all choose,kcje and ur ite friend who will u choose"?Bt i didn't,i scare their ans will nt be the one i wanna hear,even if is..i guess tat's onli they wan me feel better,i noe thr r changes,i see it clearly,nw..whenever i was wif them,i dun feel so comfortable lik last time lerHx,thr's a gap,a invisible gap tat can't be seen bt can be feel...haix,then went to candy empire to buy things,after vivo..we went chinatown lik nth happened,juz continue and stop tat topic,went thr and hav dinner uh,lol..first time xD,acc esther to her hse and back to boon lay,went home and while using com,esther call and asked wanna go 651 coffee shop bt i dun wan,awhile lata she called again and asked wan go pioneer mall then i went out wif them again,slack at mac awhile then went home at 1am,i really hope tis friendship can last long and i noe i can't treat them lik a normal friends,already used to K.C.J.E,already used to say they r my best sisters and friends.


K.C.J.E


one for quan gandi and one for my family ;)




I am tired and lazy to carry on everything nw...
2:00 AM